Our 8th wedding anniversary

Mike and I at our family pre-wedding party two nights before the big day.

 
I wanted to let all of our readers and supporters of our blog know that today, April 30th, Mike and I are celebrating our 8th wedding anniversary. We were so fortunate to be married in a ceremony we called "a loving act of civil disobedience" with 160 friends and family joining us. I get tears in my eyes just thinking about it.

I am completely in love with Mike and every day am grateful that he is my husband and that we are a family.

A cool thing about this anniversary is that we will be celebrating with hundreds of gay and lesbian couples tonight as we count down the hours until civil unions become legal at midnight. We will be eating and dancing at One Colorado's party, then at midnight watch as couples go to city hall to get their civil union.

We have decided to wait to become civil unioned for a day when some of our family can join us.

Civil unions are not marriages. Yet for us in Colorado, they will be the first legal recognition of same-sex couples. The next step is to overturn the state constitutional ban against same-sex marriage and then, after that battle, fight for full marriage equality.

Meanwhile, Mike and I act as if we were legally married. We work at our marriage and remind each other how important he is. We both try to be a voice for the voiceless and we try to show love to all others.

One of the many reasons we love our blog and the community we have built with it is that we have gotten to meet so many amazing people, including other gay, vegan couples. We are SO grateful for all the kindness, love and support.

One day marriage equality will be a reality. Until that day, please stick with us to fight the good fight. It will be wonderful when we can finish this fight and put even more energy to the education around animal cruelty and animal rights and strengthen our voices for those killed, tortured and living in fear just to become dinner.

Thanks y'all!

With a huge amount of love,

Dan and Mike

Our honeymoon; back-country trip at Yellowstone National Park.

A follow up to "Vegans dating non-vegans?"

With almost two years of writing a blog. we have been able to create conversation about many things and engage people who want to be a voice for the voiceless.

No blog post has created as much conversation as the blog post we posted on April 13th titled "Vegans dating non-vegans?". We also posted another blog post soon after the dating post as we gathered more information on the meningitis killing gay men in NYC and West Hollywood. These posts brought us the highest readership in 24 hours, 980! Holy cow!

In regards to the dating post, we received so much feedback and so many stories shared that I just could not believe it!

First, thanks to all of you who shared what you would do, or are doing.

I wanted to write that blog post because I hear this topic talked about a lot. My experience and feelings about it are different than many, as Mike was not vegan when we met. This April 24th, his birthday, will be his 9 year anniversary of being vegan.

What I loved about many of the comments, posts and emails we received were that our readers have a strong opinion of which way they would go, yet felt that this was very personal. Many also said it was about overall compassion.

I'd also like to say that I do not buy people any type of animal product. If I am treating, the meal is vegan. I definitely get that part of the thought process, and in dating I would not be any different. I also wouldn't have meat prepared in my home at any time when I was dating.

It's not easy. I wanted to write that post because of the several times I had read posts from loving, beautiful people who were being challenged in dating a non-vegan. My thought isn't to break up, but to see where there are more things in common. Just like I say at many protests, we all have more in common than not.

For Mike, I was the first vegan he ever sat across the table from. He fell in love with me because of my compassion for all living beings (including humans) and my passion for living. He thought I was cute too!

So many, many thanks to all of you who read the post and who entered the conversation with us. We are totally grateful and even more so are grateful that you even read our blog!

Gratitude for friendships

It was a fun, sunshiny day in Denver. I was attending a fundraisers conference at DU (University of Denver) and as always I arrived early to scope out the place and meet the speakers who always arrive early to test the audio visual. Mission accomplished and I chose a place in the middle of the room and started checking out what was going on in the world of Twitter. The conference was based on using social media in fundraising so the Twitter check was appropriate.

I was the only attendee in the room, a room seated for 600+ folks.

Suddenly a woman says hello to me. I can't remember if she just joined me or if I invited her to join me. She commented on my bright pink laptop cover.

This is how I met my dear friend Sarah.

Friendships to me have always been hugely important. I don't mean folks I see once in a while or those I see at different activist events. Those folks are great. I am thinking of those friends who make up the human fabric of of your life. Those who touch your soul and add an immense amount of love to your life. I'm sure you can think of them right now.

Sarah became that for me. We are both in the non-profit world. We both were married to the loves of our lives. Lunch or coffee with Sarah always makes my day, sometimes my week.

Horrific tragedy struck Sarah this year. She will never be the same. I don't want to go into the tragedy but will say that as a friend and as someone who cares deeply for her all I could do was be there for her. I could love her, hold her, hug her, run errands for her, be loving to her family and other friends who were around. I couldn't take away the excruciating pain.

I still can't. I can still do everything else I just mentioned though.

I had to say "see you later" to Sarah last night. She had moved here from England and made the difficult decision to take her sons and move back. The other night we had an amazing talk and I left with my eyes filled with tears and feeling emotionally numb.

And filled with gratitude.

As a gay man, family was not always available to me. They are now, but the whole coming out process isn't easy for anyone. These days it's a bit easier but still causes havoc in family relationships. My friends become family. They know it. I talk about it a lot. Even with great relationships with most of my family these days, my friends are my rock. They are part of what makes my life so charmed.

So it's not easy saying goodbye to one. I know I'll see her again. We talked about me and Mike meeting her in Iceland!

Thank you my dear friends. I love you.

Thanks for reading. If you'd like to connect but don't want to leave a comment, my personal email is vegandude@msn.com

Beyond grateful!

After blogging about Thanksgiving Day and then about giving to charities, I thought it would be appropriate to write about how I am just filled with gratitude.

I write this blog with a heavy heart, as Mike and I prepare to make end of life decisions for our 18 year old companion dog Shadow.

And yet that's a huge part of what I am truly grateful for, my family.

I have no clue what I have ever done to deserve the life I have or the family I have.

Mike is truly the love of my life. Being married to him is such an amazing gift. And the family we have created, with Rock, Miguel, Suga, Shadow, and Monty, is just so big and wonderful and loving that I can't help to be grateful for it every day.

And beyond our home we have wonderful family as well as our incredible family of choice, many of whom will be sitting around the Thanksgiving dinner table with us this week.

I am grateful for all those who on a daily basis act to make the world a better place for all living beings. Even when it is not easy. Or popular. Or safe. These people are my heroes.

I am grateful to be sober. That's a whole other blog post!

I am grateful for my community, for all those who love and support me, who teach me, who walk this amazing path with me.

I am grateful to have an incredible job that I love.

There is so much more, but I imagine you get the idea.

Yet before I finish, I have to mention that I am beyond grateful for all of those folks who take time to read this blog and for those who write such beautiful things to me about the blog. Yesterday we got a note that said that we are such an inspiration. Wow.

Thanks for reading!

I love Thanksgiving

No, Thanksgiving is not indicative of slaughter or genocide to me. I have never lost sight that in the US 45 million turkeys will be slaughtered for Thanksgiving just as I never lose sight of that on a daily basis millions of animals suffer in labs and factory farms, etc.

I have simply redefined what Thanksgiving Day is.

Thanksgiving Day is my husband's favorite holiday and it has become our favorite holiday as a couple. He loves to cook and we love to fill our home with family and friends and many times show off how delicious a vegan Thanksgiving meal is. Mike is one of the best cooks I know so it's easy for him. One year we had 26 people for Thanksgiving dinner and had it in the back yard, one long table.

Mike and I have an incredible life. We have so much. And Thanksgiving Day is another day for us to remember that and, even though we try to do it every day, be hugely grateful for all we have.

It's also a chance for us to remind people why we are vegan, and why veganism is the perfect way to live if one loves and/or cares about animals.

It's also a chance to say thank you to our family of choice, those dear friends of ours whom we love and who are like family to us.

So Thanksgiving Day can be about great vegan food, celebrating family and family of choice, and simply looking around the table and feeling oh so grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving to you our readers. We totally appreciate the fact that you read our blog and support us as a gay married couple and as two vegans trying to make the world a better place for all living beings.