I was on Twitter today and read a tweet from a young woman who is vegan and is having challenges in her relationship with her boyfriend who is not vegan.
In the 17 years of being vegan I have heard this a lot, and have even heard that people who are vegan should not date people who are not vegan.
That is super crazy for me.
In the gay male world of Colorado there would have been slim pickings for dating if I had stuck to only men who were vegan. Fortunately for me I never asked guys if they were vegan before a date. I would have never dated and fallen in love with Mike had I chosen to only date vegan men.
I totally get the allure of dating only vegan people. It shows they are loving, compassionate and at least on some levels have something in common with you. The again, people choose to go vegan for many reasons. Mine was to do as least harm as possible while experiencing this thing we call life. I want no part in animal cruelty.
For Mike and I, we met at our church. Our first date was a movie, dinner and then dancing. For dinner we went to PF Changs and he ordered his first on-purpose vegan meal. He didn't really know what a vegan was before we started dating and was curious.
For me and dating it was always trying to be in the moment. Of course if it ever got to the point where I would live with somebody and they were not vegan I would have to ask for rules around no former living beings in the house. I never had to do that.
My ex became veg before we moved in together. Mike became vegan long before we even talked about living together or even getting married.
A little over a month after we began dating Mike became vegetarian for my Valentine's Day gift. He told me while we were on a sweet date night. He had not really eaten meat in front of me since we began dating, maybe once, but I don't remember it if he did.
So it boils down to mutual respect. If you know that eating meat bothers me, and you are interested in dating me, perhaps you won't eat meat in front of me. It's really not that big of a deal. Especially if you totally dig me!
Mike continued being a vegetarian for a couple of months. Then, in April, he became vegan as a birthday gift to himself. Not for me, for him and the animals.
There are many people out there who might be an amazing date/time/life partner for you. They may not have all of the information around animal cruelty that you do. They may have never had a conversation with someone about veganism or what veganism even is.
I say that if you are single and meet someone you think right off is pretty nice, go for it.
Respect. Love. Compassion. And of course passion! It all doesn't come instantly, but with the right person it comes.
Thank you so much for reading this! I would totally love your feedback!
Gay and vegan in the burbs (of Los Angeles). I blog about veganism, equality, compassion, activism, politics, spirituality and the awesome life experiences of The Gay Vegans. The "s" includes my husband, Mike! I believe that we all have more in common than not and that we all have the power to be the voice of the voiceless. I want this blog to be a tool for me to build bridges amongst communities and those with differing opinions.
Showing posts with label partners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label partners. Show all posts
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)